


The Buckley Siblings

by popayamorphaya



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Anxiety, Homophobia Warning, Humor, M/M, anxious buck, buck is confused, buck is gay, eddie is bi, fluff too, i promise it’s gonna be more happy than angsty, not good with tags, supportive maddie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-19
Updated: 2019-04-03
Packaged: 2019-10-31 12:24:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 17,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17849435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/popayamorphaya/pseuds/popayamorphaya
Summary: Buck and Maddie are going through a lot, Bucks struggling with his sexuality and his slight anxiety, plus his gigantic crush on Eddie. Maddie’s dealing with her budding romance with Chimney, her first relationship since escaping her abusive ex and dealing with the aftermath of his return.





	1. Chapter 1

“Buck?”

“Oh! Hey! Eddie! What- what are you doing here?” Buck nervously asked, his palms were sweating so much he could barely hold his knife and fork anymore

“We’re having a family dinner, we thought we’d try something new. Who’s this?” Eddie asked looking towards the man sitting across from Buck. Buck was just beginning to accept his possible bisexuality and this was him just testing the waters, he hadn’t fully accepted the possibility of him being bisexual let alone his friend and co-worker finding out before he even had. So he obviously made a flimsy attempt to explain it without it being romantic in any sorts

“This is uh- Bryan, he’s.. he’s uh, he’s my uh...” Buck looked around the room for inspiration, any inspiration, then he quickly spotted a photograph of a man and woman dancing 

“My dance coach! Yeah... he’s teaching me how to dance. I just decided to pick up a new hobby, you know..” 

“Hi, I’m Eddie, I’m Bucks friend and co-worker. It’s nice to meet you!” Eddie put his hand out for the other man to shake and greeted him with his award winning smile

“Yeah. Nice to meet you too..” Bryan was clearly confused about the whole situation, he guessed that Buck wasn’t out and he could respect that so he went along with the act

“Anyways, I can’t keep Shannon and Christopher waiting, enjoy your meal!” Eddie said waving goodbye

“I- I’m so sorry, I can’t thank you enough. There’s no way I could’ve ever faced coming out just yet

“It’s no problem, I get the anxiety, it’s not easy and you just have to do it when you’re comfortable” 

Buck and Bryan went on with their meal, trying to keep physical contact minimised as to not raise suspicion.

-

“I never knew Buck had a boyfriend, or that he was into guys.” Shannon said taking a bite from her meal

“What? Bucks not on a date with him, like he said, that’s just his dance teacher” Shannon had to scoff at that, she couldn’t believe how oblivious Eddie was

“That’s obviously a cover story. He was probably just trying to keep it on the low until he knew whether or not it was serious 

“No, Bucks not into guys. If he were he would’ve told me, we’re best friends” 

“Yeah okay. You’re right, I’m sure that is his dance teacher.” Shannon replied, clearly unconvinced

Eddie glanced back at Buck and his date, clearly considering Shannon’s words and the possibility of them

-

Eddie decided it best not to talk to Buck instantly, he was still questioning Bucks sexuality and he figured if Buck was into men he’d be embarrassed about someone seeing him before he came out so he wanted to give him a little bit of space. Well that’s what he told himself. It was really because while he was okay with Buck liking guys, he disliked those guys not being Eddie. 

Buck and Eddie finally had their first shift together since the whole occurrence and Buck was doing his best to avoid Eddie, he was so scared of what Eddie might say. Sure Eddie was accepting of Hen, but would it be different with Buck because he’s a guy?

A million thoughts raced through Bucks head, would this ruin his friendship with Eddie? Would Eddie treat him differently? Oh god.. would Eddie help him if he were in danger? He knew these thoughts were irrational and unrealistic but he couldn’t shake the anxiety. That’s why, while everyone was sitting round the table at the station laughing and sharing their weekend, Buck was fighting tears back and breathing heavily thinking of all this, so he quickly jumped up and walked off to the locker room.

Luckily Chimney had invited Maddie over for dinner so she excused herself to go see how Buck was doing. She was the only one that knew of Buck questioning his sexuality. She saw Buck sitting there with his head in his hands trying desperately to control his breathing.

“Hey, hey come here.” She sat beside Buck, hugging onto him tightly as he let the held back tears finally well over

“Do you wanna tell me what’s wrong?” Maddie said softly

“I’m just... I can’t deal with my sexuality.. it’s so stressful! Why does it have to be so hard, why can’t it just be easy!” Buck let out a shaky breath 

“Eddie saw me on a date with a guy.. I don’t know how he’ll handle it. I know he loves Hen so much and accepts her but... what if it’s different? What if the rest of the station see me differently? What if I turn out to be straight and then they have all these locked down opinions on me? What.. what if it’s like mom and dad?”

 

Maddie didn’t realise how much that still haunted him, this is why he’s been so cautious and scared about the whole thing. It has to have been hard for him to trust anybody when his own mother and father, who had loved him so so much up until the moment they caught him kissing another boy, threw him out. 

Buck was only 16 and Maddie 19 when they moved to LA to live with their grandma, there was no way Maddie was leaving her little brother to go to LA all alone. She was heartbroken when she learned that Buck hid what their parents did, he was the one trying to protect her from the evilness of their parents, trying to keep their relationship together, when he was the one that needed her protection. 

 

“Hey, look at me, they’re not like that, they love you no matter what, they’re your real family. They will always love and fight for you, and so will I, but I understand that it’s hard and you don’t have to come out until you’re ready. Eddie won’t tell anyone and he won’t bring it up.” Maddie reassured her brother brining him into a tight embrace

“Thank you Mads, I love you so much. I don’t know what I’d do without you.” Buck says, strengthening their hug

“Hey, I just came to check on you guys and make sure you’re okay?” Eddie said hanging about the doorway 

“I’m fine now, I just need a minute, you two go on ahead.”

Maddie kissed Bucks forehead and it brought him back to when he’d crawl into Maddies bed and she’d always kiss his forehead before he would drift off


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> didn’t plan on posting until tomorrow but i’m feeling really inspired to write some more so hey ho here we go, also thank you for reading!

Maddie was sitting inside her closet, trying to keep her shaky breath and crying at bay in order to hide. Her ex had just broken in and she was terrified for her life, she had no idea what he’d do to her for escaping him. 

She was so scared for her life that after she quickly called 911 she went to text Buck, she didn’t want to tell him because she knew he’d rush into danger to save her and she couldn’t handle seeing her baby brother getting hurt, so she simply texted him saying “This is random but Buck, I love you so much and I’m so proud of the man you’ve become. I’m so sorry I left you and just know I’ll always love you.” She sent that text and then sent another saying “Ugh, sorry I’m being so sappy I was just watching a sad movie and it made me think of how grateful I am for you” as to not raise any suspicion.

She couldn’t believe this might be her last day, it’s scary how things can happ-

The closet door bursts open and there he is, Maddies ex husband. He grabs her by her wrist harshly as he pulls her up off the floor and onto the bed.

“You really thought it’d be that easy. That you could just up and leave me? Oh don’t be so stupid Maddie.” He said in a harsh tone before hitting her face

He turned around to go turn the house alarm off and Maddie took the opportunity and pushed him head first into the wall and ran off while he nursed his bleeding head 

She ran quickly through the front door looking back to see if he was close but she saw nothing, she must-

“Woah, slow your roll- oh my god Maddie, what happened to your eye!” Chimney said as Maddie ran straight into him

“Chimney we can’t be here please we have to go!” Maddie said in a shaky voice as tears flooded her eyes

Chimney didn’t know why they had to go but he just knew he had to run so they got into the car and just as they were about to drive off they were surrounded by police cars

“Get out! Get out of the car now!” A police woman shouted at Chimney holding a gun to him “Are you okay ma’am? Did he hurt you?”

“No! That’s not him, he’s inside! I- He might have a gun, I managed to hit him and slow him down” Maddie rambled on clearly shaken up and scared as the police woman let go of Chimney and he held her in his arms

-

The officers came out with Maddies abuser in handcuffs, she was holding onto Chimney like her life depended on it and Chimney shielded her face from the sick bastard that would do such a horrible thing. 

Maddie let’s out a sigh of relief as most of the police cars drive off. Leaving just one behind so they could take a statement from both of them

-

It was a about 3 weeks later when Buck suggested the station should start a tradition of a weekly movie night, he knew Maddie loved spending dinners at the station with everyone but she didn’t get to do it so often. Maddie was also just as much their family as anybody else so he knew she’d be 100% up for it, same for everyone else. 

They had planned on doing it at Maddies house but that was before she announced she was moving again, she loved that house so much but after the events there was no way she could be happy there again so while everything was being finalised she stayed with Buck in his apartment, and, just like old times they cuddled up every night and Maddie kissed Bucks forehead goodnight, and he kissed hers too. 

-

The first movie they watched was obviously die hard, Chimney bought her it because obviously everyone had to see die hard, but she never got the chance so she thought they could all watch it together. 

 

They all gathered in Athena’s comfy living room after a nice delicious dinner together, now with their popcorn and other sweet assortments. They all cuddled up with a partner, Athena of course snuggling up with Bobby, Maddie with Chimney, Hen with her wife who was also welcomed with open arms, and well, Buck and Eddie were 5 feet apart cause they’re not gay!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promised to make it happy and I will stick to that in the next chapter, I just really wanted to write about Maddies experience and I had tears threatening to spill over while writing this because it’s so sad but from here on it’s all happy for the buckley siblings


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a warning this might be a little too sexual for some people so beware!

Buck has no idea how he got here, how he found himself in his bed, shirtless, moaning and panting as he took off Eddies shirt while Eddie left a trail of hickeys across Bucks body. It didn’t make sense, one moment they were drinking beers in the living room talking about what’s been happening recently, barely paying attention to whatever was on the tv, next minute they’re making out on the sofa and then the minute after that they’re about to have sex.

He was so caught up in the moment he never even considered what this was, was Eddie even into guys or was it just pity? Was he experementing or was he just horny with no other outlet? Whatever it was they couldn’t take back the kissing and Buck wanted this so bad so he went along with it, it was either lose his friend because they made out or lose his friend because they had sex. To Buck it didn’t matter because the outcome was the same, except in this particular one he’d at least have one night with Eddie.

While Buck was lost in thought Eddie was already removing Bucks jeans revealing a pair of red boxers with a bear eating honey and the words “Honey Buns” all on the back. Well this was pretty embarrassing. Eddie just let out a smile while kissing Buck before Buck went to remove Eddies jeans. Lucky for Eddie his weren’t embarrassing..

Buck shakily went for the nightstand beside his bed, grabbing the condoms and lube, he was so shocked and excited that this was happening he barely managed to keep still for a second. He looked at Eddie before they kissed and now that they were finally down to the last layer Eddie took it slow. Teasing him and leaving hickeys on his neck before he grabbed the waistband of Bucks boxers and pulled do-

BEEP BEEP BEEP

Bucks alarm yelled furiously

Buck looked around his bed, no Eddie... damnit, of course it was all a dream. Well this is going to be a really awkward shift Buck thought, he didn’t know how he was gonna look at him without going back to that dream. 

-

When Buck finally arrived at the station the first face he saw was of course, Eddie. God he couldn’t even have five minutes without being completely and utterly embarrassed. As Eddie walked over he began to blush furiously, the dream still fresh in his dumb traitorous brain.

“Hey, you’re here early. Why are you blushing so much?” Eddie inclined

“Uhm... nothing I just had.. it’s hot in here isn’t it!” Buck was just grabbing at strings at this point

“No? The AC is on and it’s still a pretty cool day anyways. Are you okay? Are you sick?”

“You know what yeah maybe I’m just a little exhausted. I just need to sit down for a few minutes, bye!” Buck said quickly running off to the locker room where he knows Eddie won’t be this early.

“Buck hey, you’re not usually here this early?” Bobby asked. Today was like a police questioning. They should be grateful he’s here early to help around, even though he’s totally not doing that

“God you’re all so nosy! I can be here early without it being suspicious!” No he can’t, he came here early because he thought he could hide from Eddie if he got there before him, he wasn’t counting on Eddie being there early every morning.

With that Bobby cautiously left the locker room, not wanting to poke the bear.

“Buck! I’ve been trying to find you!” God give me a break Buck whispered before Eddie could hear

“Hey what’s up buddy-o! How ya hangin’?” Buck said trying to be as cool as possible

“Oookaayyyy? I was just wondering if you wanted to come workout with me?”

“Yeah dog, I’m down for that. Lemme just grab my stuff and I’ll meet you out there bruh!” Buck was internally kicking himself for acting so dumb

“Uh, sure” Eddie was just completely lost at this point

-

So, how’s your love life going, meet any new girls lately?” Eddie asked

“UHH..” Buck said a little too loudly “Yeah, yes of course, lots of uh girls.. because that’s my thang.. ya know bro, meeting lots of girls at all the bars. Every night yeah.. lots of- lots of women, I love it, you know, sex with women.. just love it!” Buck was just oh so stupidly rambling on

“How are things with you and Shannon?” Buck asked at an attempt to save himself from whatever the hell that was

“They’re great, we’ve been getting along amazingly well. Actually she just started seeing a new guy, she really likes him.”

“Wai- what? She’s seeing other guys? You guys are polyamoron? Amorol? Amborous?”

“Amorous, and no, what are you on about we broke up years ago Buck, remember?” 

“But you guys hooked up, and then the restaurant? You guys were out on a date?” Buck was so lost it was hurting his head

“Buck, that was a family outing. We agreed to stay as friends and we thought the best way to parent was spending time together as a family. You really thought we were still together?”

“Yeah, I mean you never told me that was a one time hookup? And then at the Christmas outing you acted like you wanted back with her..” Buck felt so stupid for thinking they were together. How could he not know?

“No, never. I loved Shannon, she was amazing and I still love her but I’m just not in love with her, y’know?” 

“Yeah, because, you know, I was just hiding my secret ex wife from you. So yeah I totally relate..” Buck pretends to look sad

“Oh shut up! You’ll meet a girl someday y’know, and when you have girl problems I’m gonna turn you away just to spite you!” Eddie said jokingly

“Boy problems y’mean” Buck inaudibly muttered under his breath 

“What?” Eddie had no clue what he said, luckily for Buck

“Nothing! I never said anything!” Buck was panicking thinking Eddie had heard him so his dumbass brain tried to cover from him. But Buck has to learn not to trust his brain because it told him to yell four oh so stupid words

“I have a girlfriend!”

“You do? How come you never told me about her?” Frankly Eddie was a little hurt, but by what? The fact Bucks been hiding things or the fact Bucks dating someone?

“I was waiting until things got serious yeah that’s why..” 

“Well congrats Buck I’m so happy for you!” Eddie said just a little too harshly. It was definitely option 2.

“Thank you, she’s a real catch and stuff, yup. Yeah I really like her, a lot, she has the most beautiful brown eyes...” Buck said while looking at Eddies beautiful brown eyes too. I wonder what made him say that?

“Hey, you should invite her to movie night, I’m sure nobody will mind having her come over and it’d be nice for her to meet the squad”

“Fu- Fun! I’m up for that yeah- yes oh my god what a great idea I’d love to bring my girlfriend, damn yes!” Buck is kinda maybe dying inside

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I ever mention I really like to make people think it’s gonna be sexual but then freezing it just as it’s getting to the main event? Because I do!
> 
> Also I wanted to add a picture of the boxers at the end but I don’t know how to so here’s a link: 
> 
> https://www.lazyone.com/products/honey-buns-bear-mens-funny-boxer-62/
> 
> They’re so cute!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to change the title don’t mix wine and secrets to a more basic, but an actual related title. I like it better anyways because the old one was just a dumb quick attempt at making an interesting title

So.. Buck told Eddie he’d bring his non existent girlfriend to movie night with the squad. A W K W A R D... the hell happens now? Movie night is way too close for him to find a girlfriend.. He could buy himself a week by saying she’s busy but next week will work. He couldn’t delay it too long because Eddie would just try find another day for them to all meet and this ways just easier.

Think. Think Buck damnit! He doesn’t even have any friends outside the squad other than old ones from before he moved to LA but of course they don’t live here so that’s pointless. He didn’t wanna hire from one of those hire a date things. He was dedicated to hiding his sexuality but not enough to put money into it. 

He also wasn’t willing to actually ask a girl out and then put her in an awkward situation and lead her on, that’s just cruel but then what were his other options? He was totally and royally screwed. Oh wait, well yeah that’ll work. I don’t know how he didn’t think of that sooner.

He whipped out his phone searching for Eddies name and began typing.. he just hopes to god Eddie hadn’t told anyone else because that would really make this hard. He scanned the text over making sure it seemed believable and not like the total lie it was.

-

Eddie was sitting watching frozen with Christopher cuddled up in a comfy blanket, with the news of frozen 2 coming out Christopher wanted to prepare for it by watching the first over and over until it came out. Frozen was one of his favourites, he loved Olaf’s kind nature and reindeers were his favourite animal as of late so that only furthered his love. 

Eddies phone dinged on the coffee table, he quickly peeked at it to make sure it wasn’t an emergency as he made the rule no phones during family time. He read the first line seeing it clearly wasn’t an emergency, even if it was, Buck would’ve went to Maddie first and he knows Maddie enough to know she’d never leave Buck high and dry in an emergency. She was always there for him and whenever it was something important she would text back just as the three dots finished.

After the movie finished and Eddie carried a worn out Christopher to bed and tucked him in he went to the living room to tidy up. Not before he checked to see Bucks text

‘Hey Eddie, don’t mean to bother you in case you’re busy but my girlfriend can’t come to movie night with me.. actually she broke up with me. Anyways have a nice night, bye!’ 

Clearly Buck wasn’t familiar with heartbreak because that was written like a message a school or your boss would send out. It was so... emotionless? Of course Eddie didn’t focus on that because he also broke social cues by smiling a little bit. Not that he’s happy Bucks heart was broken.. he’s just happy Bucks single. He doesn’t exactly know why given Bucks straight but even in that case it makes him feel a little better

‘Buck I’m so sorry, I’d invite you over to drink your feels away but it’s late and Shannon doesn’t have Christopher until next weekend. I hope you feel better soon though’ 

Eddie, evidently, does not reread his texts because this was a break up, not a common cold. 

‘It’s all good, Maddie and I are watching a movie’ Buck replied with a selfie of him and Maddie dramatically pouting with a glass of wine in their hands, boy the Buckley siblings loved wine.

-

“So, you told Eddie you had a girlfriend” Maddie said as she peeked over at Bucks phone, she was not supposed to know about that

“Stop reading my phone!” 

“It’s not like you’re hiding somethi- oh wait you are, a non existent girlfriend” Maddie replied sarcastically 

“Ex girlfriend if you must know”

“You never had a girlfriend!” 

“You don’t know that!”

“Buck. You seem to be forgetting I know you’re gay.”

“Damnit I wish I never told you..” Buck said jokingly

“So.. care to elaborate on why you told Eddie you had a girlfriend?” 

“I panicked..” 

“You... panicked? That’s why you told him you had a girlfriend?” 

“Yes Maddison, that is why I told him I had a girlfriend! That’s what I just said!” At that Maddie gave him a death stare

“Do. Not. Call. Me. Maddison, Evan!” Maddie poked him in the chest after every word

“Don’t call me Evan!”

“I’m older than you so I’M in charge!” Maddie fought back

Before Buck could argue back the doorbell rang

“I’ll get that!” Maddie said smugly as she purposely flipped her hair in Bucks eyes, knowing the pain and torture of having hair hit you in the eyes

“OW DAMNIT MADDIE!” 

“Hey guys I brought pizza!” Chimney said as he walked in to see Buck hysterically nursing his eyes and cursing

“You are a godsend Chimney!” Buck managed to let out as he continued to nurture his poor eyes

“What’s wrong with him?” Chimney asked Maddie and she shrugged innocently 

“The devil does, in fact, wear prada and her name is Maddison Buckley!” Buck hissed at Maddie

“What happened?” Chimney questioned them both like he was their guardian

“He called me Maddison!” Maddie argued

“He... called you Maddison?” 

“Yes!” Maddie argued like that was the worst thing that could’ve happened 

“Well she called me by my name too!” That confused Chimney, who cares if she called him Buck? What was he even going on about

“Who cares? You don’t have a nickname? Everyone calls you Buck..” Chimney obliviously replied

“Oh... my god. You think his real names Buck? You haven’t told anyone your real name!” Maddie laughed

“Wait wait wait, Buck isn’t your real name?” 

“You think my names.. Buck Buckley?”

“Well.. now that you say it aloud it sounds silly!” 

“Well well well, Ev-“ Maddie begun as Buck slammed his hand over her mouth

“I’m sorry I called you Maddison, I’ll never do it again please don’t tell him!” Buck doesn’t even have a decent reason, his name isn’t embarrassing it’s a very popular name. It’s just one of those things where you like to keep it between a discreet few so you can giggle at the fact other people don’t know 

“Okay. Apology accepted. Now pizza!” Maddie almost bounced in her seat waiting for the pizza as Buck let out a sigh of relief. Chimney knew there was no point trying to get the information from either of them. He might just do a little snooping while he’s in there getting plates and wine...

Yeah Buck doesn’t just leave his letters in an empty drawer so nice try bud

They’d have to finish their conversation another time. Pizza trumps your brothers secret and non existent girlfriend


	5. Chapter 5

Maddie was sleeping peacefully in her brand new apartment. She was having a wonderful dream where she was casually in a hot air balloon, there was a cheese platter and some wine sat out for her and Chimney was there. They were jetting off to Italy for brunch, as you do in a hot air balloon. Her best friend, Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta, otherwise known as Lady Gaga, or Stef, to Maddie, had told her about this delightful cafe near The Leaning Tower of Pisa. Obviously Maddie just had to try it out and who better to invite than Chimney.

It had turned out that Stef had planned the whole thing along with Chimney, he wanted to give Maddie a special proposal but there was no way Chimney could unsuspiciously get a hot air ballon to Italy so Stef had the idea put in Maddies head. Anyways he was getting down on one knee on the hot air balloon as they had back home when suddenly

Bzz Bzz

“Ugh who the hell is texting this early in the morning?” it was 11:50am 

‘MADDIE! SOS! COME TO FIRE STATION!’ Buck had text

Maddie was convinced this was one of those situations that was important but not an SOS, of course she couldn’t risk showing up late to a potentially real SOS so she took a quick shower, put her clothes on, sat down and had some cereal before applying just a little bit of eyeliner and lipstick. Maybe it was an SOS but Chimney was there so...

-

Okay so it turned out the emergency was that Buck was just really bored and wanted to hang with Maddie, knowing fine well Maddie wouldn’t get up and out at 12pm on her day off work to hang with him. She couldn’t believe he’d do this. How absolutely ridiculous.

“Buck. What the hell. You brought me over here. Telling me it was an emergency. At 12pm. To hang with you. Is this a joke?”

“I’d take it as a compliment that I worked so hard to hang out with my big sister..” Buck replied with his puppy dog eyes

“That’s not a compliment that’s a pai-”

“Where is he!” A woman angrily stormed into the station

“I’m sorry ma’am you can’t be in here unless you need help with something” Bobby said back

“I’m looking for Buck! BUCK GET OUT HERE YOU WIMP!” She screamed 

“Jenna.. Wh- What are you doing here?” Buck asked concerned

Everyone gathered upstairs watching over the drama that unfolded

“This is what I’m doing here!” She threw a bagged pregnancy test almost hitting in the face

“This- this is positive? You’re pregnant? I’m- is it... mine?” Buck asked

“What the hell do you mean is it yours, of course it’s yours, you ass!” She screamed back

Everyone looked at each other mouths drooping on the ground, including Maddie despite her knowing his big secret. Then again this wouldn’t be the first time Buck tried to force himself into liking women so she wasn’t really shocked to be honest, just shocked that he was going to be a dad

“Jenna.. I’m so so sorry.. I don’t know how this happened but I promise I’ll be there for you every step of the way, no matter what choice you make” Buck comforted her and her expression softened

“I already know I’m keeping it.. I, thank you Buck. I really need you alongside me with this. You promise to be there though? Through everything, no matter how tough it gets?” She asks just to make sure she doesn’t get her hopes up too quick

“I promise” he says pulling her in for a gentle hug

Everyone came down to begrudgingly congratulate Buck on impregnating a one night stand, all of them awkwardly. Eddie was the last to congratulate him as he tried to escape the situation by lying and saying he was in the gym. Of course Bobby was up for none of that.

“Congrats. Good luck.” Eddie said bitterly

“So, uhm.. how many weeks are you?” Hen asks Jenna just as she moved from behind a table, exposing a large baby bump that had to be about 7 or 8 months along

“Oh my god!” Chimney leaned over whispering into Hen’s ear

“Wow... you’re really pregnant..” Eddie said

“Yeah, me and my wife are really excited!” Jenna replied

“Wait, what?” Maddie asks confused

“APRIL FOOLS!” Buck and Jenna shouted at the same time

“Guys, this is my friend Jenna, she and her wife used a sperm donor and they’re expecting in 2 months!” 

After Jenna got settled and they all congratulated her the conversations began

“How did you and Jenna meet?” Chimney questioned and at that they looked eachother in the eyes

“Uh.. it was at a barbecue. A friend of a friend of a friend!” Jenna lied, Buck wouldn’t tell them they met at an LGBTQ+ support group and Buck mouthed a thank you when nobody was looking

Eddie was visibly more relaxed since the news, he still doesn’t get why always gets hung on straight guys, not that he liked Buck! They were just friends, yeah, he’s hung up on a different straight guy... Obviously!

They all spent the rest of their time getting to know Jenna until the alarm went off. They were lucky that it was a really dead day because Jenna really clicked with all of them. In fact Maddie invited her to the house party she was throwing, Jenna would only be there for a quick hour or two because Maddie was planning to bring out the drinks once it got late.

-

When Eddie got home he let out a sigh of relief, it was especially hard for him to see a woman come in claiming to be Bucks baby momma. He moved over to the bathroom where he pulled something out the trash can that was wrapped in tissue.

Eddie just stared at it, what the hell was he going to do he thought while he dumped the positive pregnancy test back in the trash.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> surprise


	6. Chapter 6

* * *

_A few days ago..._

 

It was a Thursday morning and Eddie was eating eating his cereal and enjoying the calm of the morning. Most days were hectic because he had to get Christopher up and ready for school and then jet straight off to work where he attempted to get breakfast there, but sometimes that never got to happen, emergencies don’t wait for Eddie to finish breakfast.

This day though, Shannon had Christopher. It had been about 5 or so months since she returned and he trusted her fully so he began letting her have Christopher once a week. When she moved to LA she had bought a 2 bedroom house even before, always hoping she’d get to see her baby again.

He worried a little about them, his only time away from Christopher was when he was at work or Christopher had school. He also really missed seeing him after work but he knew he needed time with his mother and he was grateful Shannon was back in both their lives.

As he sat and ate his breakfast the mail came, there was a bubble lined envelope which he thought was weird because he didn’t order anything as far as he could remember. He finished his cereal not wanting it to get soggy, before he picked the package up. He had a little more time before work and the package had Eddies name and address on it so it wasn’t delivered to the wrong person.

He sat at the table and opened it up, inside was a letter which he read before opening

 

Dear Eddie,

I’m not sure if you’ll remember me but a few weeks back we met at a bar, we were both pretty drunk and                      we made it back to your place. Anyways, I’m eight weeks pregnant and you’re the father. I’ve made the decision to give the baby up so you can either take custody or I can go for adoption. My phone number it’s there, please phone me as soon as you    decide.

\- Lauren

 

Eddie took in a shaky breath before reaching in the envelope to pull out a positive pregnancy test. His heart had skipped a beat when he read that Lauren was pregnant but to actually see the pregnancy test, well now his heart felt like it was skipping a thousand beats. 

He had to take the day off work because he had to collect himself a little more, he’s not sure saving lives while stressing out like this was anywhere near smart. 

The worst part was, there was no one. He didn’t feel like he could confide in anyone, Buck would be his go to but they’ve been slowly drifting apart. Buck always acts nervous around him lately and he’s been making up fake excuses to avoid Eddie. This was also a baby with a woman he had a one night stand with, a woman he didn’t know and a woman who didn’t want this child. When he learned he was first going to be a dad with Shannon, it was amazing, they sat and cried happy tears about it for the entire weekend. 

Eddie was staring at the pregnancy test with a blank expression on his face, he was deep in thoughts about how he was going to do this, he was so focused he drained out any noise around him, including the knocking on the door. He rushed up to get it in hopes that it was Lauren, but it wasn’t.

”Hey Eddie, Buck told me you were sick so I brought you some soup” Maddie said as she barged into the house, Eddie and her were close and he knew how insistent she could be when caring for other people

But that’s when she stopped dead in her tracks before Eddie could stop her from barging in, crap! The pregnancy test!

”It’s none of my business” Maddie said as she went to heat up the soup “Let’s just get you feeling better!”

”Maddie, I’m not sick.” 

“Then why would you take the day off work?” She questioned and Eddie pointed towards the letter

”Read it..” Maddie already knew now and he figured since she knew he could at least confide in her

Maddie scanned over the letter, once, twice and a third just to make sure she wasn’t misreading anything

”Uh huh, uh huh. So you’re gonna be a dad! Congrats!” She said trying to lighten his mood and remind him it’d be okay even without a mother there for the baby

”Maddie, what the hell do I do? I’m terrified! I mean I’m kind of excited but I’m mostly terrified! What if she asks who her mother is? What do I tell her? I don’t wanna lie but I can’t force Lauren to be a mother but a child deserves to know who their mother is and-” Eddie said spiralling out of control

”It’s gonna be a girl?” Maddie questioned

”I don’t know, why are you asking that?” 

“You said she”

”Did I?”

”Yes.”

”Huh.. I guess I was just kinda hoping I’d have a daughter I guess..” at that Maddie had to smile as she pulled Eddie in for a comforting hug.

“Eddie, I get this will be hard and I get that it means a lot of change will happen but you will always have me and the squad. Especially Buck. You will get through this and it’ll come to you naturally. You’re an amazing dad to Christopher and you’re gonna be an amazing dad to this baby too.”

”Thank you Maddie. That really means a lot.” Eddie let out a sigh of relief, “I honestly don’t know what I would do without you guys..” Eddie pulled Maddie back in for a hug

”Hey, you still look sad. Do you want me to stay here with you? We could talk names or something?”

”Actually it’s about what you said.. Bucks been acting weird around me a lot lately, he’s always anxious or avoiding me. We barely have normal conversations anymore. Is he okay? Do you know what’s wrong?” 

“It’s not really my place to tell you, but you shouldn’t be worried. He’s working through it and he’ll be back to himself in no time” Maddie was kinda pissed at her brother for making Eddie feel that way, she knows it’s not his fault but if he’d been a better friend as of late Eddie would’ve been confiding in him and not worrying so much.

 

-

 

Buck was just finishing his shift as he plopped down into his car, after a long shift he liked to just sit there for 10 or more minutes in peace

”Boo!” Maddie screamed from the back seat behind Bucks after a minute or two of silence, she was crouched down and the tinted windows made it hard to see inside the car so of course Buck had the normal reaction and elbowed her right in the nose.

”AHHHH WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR ASSHO-“

”I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA KILL ME!”

”MAYBE LOOK FIRST BEFORE YOU ASSUME SOMEOMES GONNA KILL YOU!” Maddie said screaming and nursing her gushing nose.

”Oh my god I’m so sorry, let me just get you something to clean it up!” He said handing her an entire kitchen roll

After 10 minutes of Maddie nursing her probably broken nose and Buck almost crying a thousand apologies they finally sat down in silence, Maddie now in the passenger seat

”What were you even doing in the back of my car?” 

“I was trying to scare you, duh!”

”You broke into my car just so you could come and.. scare me?” Buck questioned 

“No, I wanted to talk to you. We need to have a word.” Maddie replied sternly

”Uh oh.. that’s never good.. You know what we have to wait for another time I have a lot of work!” Buck said trying to open the locked doors

“I already locked you in buddy. Let’s talk about you and Eddie.”

”What.. There’s nothing to talk about..” 

“Look, I love you, you know that, but sometimes... you can be a real dumbass!” Maddie scolded him “I know your intention was never to hurt Eddie, but with everything going on you’re not acting normal around him and you’re avoiding him. He needs his friend and you need to talk to someone other than me.” 

“I talk to other people!” Buck fought back

”Not outside of work. You’re only spending time with me lately, none of your other friends and I get why. You like being able to talk about your problems and you don’t like lying to your friends and you don’t know how to act around them anymore. You just have to attempt it though, go to the movies with them, and actually engage when they come over for movie night. You came up with it and they’re gonna feel weird if you don’t seem comfortable. I’m just trying to look out for you, idiot” she said softly

”I hate you when you’re right. You get smug.”

”Aw.. so you’ve hated me all day every day for my entire life?”

“Shut up”

“I can’t help that I’m always amazing and right” she said while taking the perfect selfie during golden hour 

 

* * *

 

 

Buck waved hello to his neighbor in the apartment next to his with a smile as he walked into his own where his smile immediately fell. He went over to the fridge where there was nothing but a couple supermarket sandwiches he hadn’t touched in days. He saw that they were going bad so he threw them all in the trash and decided he didn’t have to eat today. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so I guess I lied about the humour from here on out (I think I said that after chapter 2 or 3 honestly I don’t even know but I meant to so...?) we boutta enter the angst again 🤠🤠


	7. Chapter 7

****** ***** **TRIGGER** **WARNING*****

 

 **This** **chapter** **is** **going** **to** **involve** **a** **lot** **of** **talk** **about** **depression,** **eating** **disorders and more so**   **please** **be** **aware!**

 

* * *

 

Buck sat and stared at the wall. He’d been having dark thoughts lately. He was doing poorly at work, so poorly he chose to stay behind and do work at the fire station. He knew there was a limit and he knew lives were on the line so he couldn’t afford to be anything less than utterly amazing. He felt like a failure and like he didn’t deserve his job or his friends, they were all amazing and flawless and he felt like every last strand of DNA in his body was flawed.

He’d also been dealing with insomnia, he couldn’t get those thoughts out his mind and whenever he did get to sleep it was always nightmares. Every night, he lay in his bed in utter darkness and silence remembering how his parents didn’t love him for who he was. He felt like a giant, unlovable burden. The only time he had conversation anymore was with Maddie when he wanted to get advice but even that started to slow down. She didn’t know how bad things were, she knew he was dealing with anxiety but that was it.

To top it all off he had a poor appetite, he never felt like eating. His stomach rumbled and hurt but he dismissed it, he was never in the mood to. The only time he actually ate was when everyone at the station expected him to, he knew he should be eating more so he knew people would be suspicious so he ate it. It was the only time in the day, other than an apple somewhere in there, that he actually ate. Even then he would sometimes throw it up, he didn’t mean to or want to but it just happened.

Buck was bored, it was 6am and yet another sleepless night so he decided to go for a drive. He liked to drive to this one pretty private spot that was beautiful, he loved watching the stars and it was the only time he felt a spark of hope. Of course that always faded away when he had to leave.

He got in his car, taking his phone and in an attempt to force himself better, something small to eat, but still something. If there was any time, anywhere he would actually manage to eat without it being forced, it was here.

It was 6am and a relatively quiet road so he decided it would be nothing if he just drove a little faster, the sun was rising and he wanted to be home for work at 8am and nobody was there to get hurt and he knew what his limits were. The problem was that he hadn’t slept for 36 hours and his car was just so nice and warm that he began drifting to sleep. No, it’s okay he’s almost there. To keep himself awake he opened his window letting a harsh cold wind hit his face as he drove closer and closer to his destination and then he saw something on the road, an animal! He quickly turned his wheel.

 

* * *

 

 

“911 what’s your emergency?” 

“Uh- I was just hiking and, and there’s a car crashed into a tree.. I’m at the Sunny Peak trail. What do I do, it’s pretty bad.. I don’t know if I should get closer?”

”Can you tell me if anybody’s in the car and if they’re injured?”

”Y- yes, there’s a man, I think he’s in his twenties and he’s uh, oh god he has a really bad head injury! I don’t know if he’s alive!”

”It’s okay, stay calm, an ambulance and fire brigade will be there soon if you could please wait for them to arrive.”

”Yeah- I, there’s a wallet on the ground and his ID, can’t you guys like, tell a doctor and they could pull up his medical history in case he has any allergies? I’ve seen them do it in tv shows?”

”I’m not sure, hang on one second please” Maddie said waving over her boss “Is it possible we could contact the hospital and get them to pull up someone’s medical files before the patient arrives?” 

“We can try, if they can narrow it down to the right person.” Her boss says grabbing a phone to contact the closest hospital to sunny peak 

“Alright, can you give me the details please, and if you can, anything specific about him like birth marks on his face?”

”Okay, his names Evan Buckley and he was born May 3rd 1991 in Ohio”

Maddie went cold, her heart felt like it stopped and her boss knew instantly. Tears formed in Maddies eyes and she ran straight for her car. Her boss signalled a co-worker to get on Maddies line as she ran after her.

”Maddie wait!”

”No! I have to be there for him at the hospital!” Maddie said as she just about got into her car

”Let me drive you, you’re not in the right mind Maddie!” Maddie knew Pam was right so she jumped into the passenger side as Pam climbed into the drivers seat and drove off to the hospital as Maddie called Chimney because she knew she’d need him by her side.

”Chim! I’m so happy to hear your voice, can you come to the hospital near Sunny Peak, please, I really need you there!” She pleaded

”Of course, I’ll be there as soon as possible, are you okay though? What happened?” 

“Buck got into a car accident and he’s being rushed to hospital, I know you’re at work but I can’t go through this without you. But don’t tell the others until they’re finished their shifts, they can’t be distracted!” That’s so Maddie Chimney thought, even in a crisis where her emotions are everywhere she’s still thinking about the safety of other people. That’s what Chimney loved about her

”I’m so sorry Maddie, I’m just leaving. I love you and I’ll be there as soon as!” He reassured her, completely skipping over what he said, not realising he even said it. Maddie realised and if this weren’t a crisis she would be running to Chimney to say I love you back but she had to focus on Buck

Only a minute or two passed as Maddie waited near the front entrance of the hospital when a Buck was rushed in bruises and blood painting his body. Maddie followed them as they rushed him into the operating room for emergency surgery due to a branch breaking through the windshield and impaling him. 

“I’m sorry ma’am you can’t cross this line, when he’s out we’ll come find you in the waiting room”

Maddie watched as her brother was wheeled away, she began to feel dizzy and her vision went blurry before she fell, but not before Chimney could catch her.

Maddie opened her eyes to see Chimney and a doctor standing over her as she lay on an exam bed

”Ugh, what happened? One minu-” Maddie paused as she remembered “Buck! Is he out yet, is he okay?”

”Maddie you’ve only been out for a few minutes, you got overwhelmed and fainted.” Chimney informed her as she pulled him in for a hug

”How about we get some food while we’re waiting. You really should eat and Buck’s going to be a while. Dr. Fitzgerald said he’d keep updated on Buck and come find us to update us. Luckily his schedule isn’t busy

”Oh my god, thank you so much Dr. I’m really grateful!” She said hugging him tightly

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

It was a few hours after the operation, it was successful and Buck was stabilised. The rest of the squad and Athena had finished their shifts and had come to see Buck. He was still unconscious though and he would be for a while. Maddie was glad everyone was there because while they all now knew about th car accident, she had learned that Buck may not have eaten for days. That and him speeding at 6am had made her even more worried. 

Maddie and a few other squad members were in the room, everyone else outside the room as Buck opened his eyes. 

“Buck! Buck oh my god!” Maddie said as she jumped over to see her brother 

“What happened? Why am I in a hospitahhh” he said as he noticed and felt the injuries 

“Guys, I think it would be best if Buck and I had a moment alone” 

“Yeah, of course. We’re so glad you’re okay Buck!” Hen said as he gently kissed his forehead and they all left the room

”Buck.. what happened? Why were you speeding and where were you going at 6am?” Maddie was asking softly but she wanted to tear him a new one. She knew she couldn’t scream at him after he’s only been stable for a few days

”I just wanted to go a quick hike.. you know? I didn’t expect to see whatever that animal was and I just turned too quick! I’m sorry Maddie!” Buck said as he burst into tears at the pain he’s caused everyone. He would’ve been better off dead where he could never hurt anyone again he thought.

”Buck! How could you think that! We’d all be broken if you had died! We love you and we never want you dead! What the hell-” Maddie stopped as she realised she was crying and screaming, which wasn’t helping Buck get better. He hadn’t even realised he spoke aloud.

Maddie ran out with tears flooding her face and she ran straight into Chimneys embrace

”I- I just need a few minutes. I’ll be fine.. I’ll be fine” she tried to convince herself but seeing her brother so broken shattered her heart, she didn’t know how to make him better


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a disclaimer: I know nothing of the process or law dealing with mental illnesses. I am not greatly aware of the process of mental illness itself, if anyone is offended please just tell me and I will edit or delete it!

*****TRIGGER WARNING*****

**This chapter will continue to talk about Bucks depression, suicidal thoughts and eating disorders.**

 

* * *

 

 

Maddie had been given time off work and she was spending most of her time with Buck, she felt terrified to leave him alone or leave him with anyone else. She knew more than them and she was broken over her brother being suicidal and scared he’d try anything he could to harm himself. She couldn’t tell any of his friends because this is a private matter so she told Dr. Fitzgerald and he got Buck on suicide watch whenever she was gone, which was for a mere few hours to get washed and have food at the cafe.

After Buck was discharged Maddie forced him to stay with her and she made him sleep in her room so he couldn’t try anything. This was temporary because Maddie was planning on putting Buck in rehab. She felt like she was betraying him because he had no idea and he wouldn’t like it. After what their parents did to him he’s dealt with trust issues and it won’t help when Maddie forces him into this, but eventually he’ll realise she was doing what was best for him.

Maddie wasn’t capable of looking after him every day, she wasn’t able to handle the stress and fear. This way he could be safely monitored and given the right treatment he needed. Maddie would obviously visit him every day she possibly could for as long as she could. 

 

* * *

 

 

The day arrived where Buck was supposed to be admitted, he’s only going for 30 days to start off the process but then he’ll be spending nights there and eventually he’ll just have to attend a few therapy sessions each week and an evaluation each month to check his progress. 

Maddie was sad and disappointed in herself that Buck got to this point in the first place, she knew she couldn’t be blamed but at the same time she couldn’t help feel it. She was doing a good thing.

”Buck... I’m so sorry..” Maddie said as she took him to the psychiatric ward of the hospital. He just assumed they were going for a checkup and when he tried to get away Maddies current power over his weak state was superior

”Maddie, what are you doing?” Buck asked in a panic, watching tears stream down Maddies face broke him but it broke him that she was betraying him like this. She should’ve known that this was a bad idea given his issues with his parents.

”Buck, it’s easier if you don’t fight. This is for your own good. I can’t take care of you. I’m afraid to turn my back to you because of what you might do to yourself. I’m not even sure if your car accident was an accident!” Maddie said as she broke out in tears

She was right. It wasn’t an accident, he was rushing and he knew it was dangerous. He knew he should’ve been going slow, especially when getting close to a nature trail, and there wasn’t an animal. Buck knew that, he made it up in his mind the second he plowed into the tree and he always was aware there was no animal. He still felt betrayed by Maddie though. Even with every logical part of his brain was fighting that she is doing the right thing. He could see how painful this was for her but all he could remember was when he was left to be homeless by his parents. Back to that betrayal.

”I hate you.” He said in a disgusted tone, he didn’t mean it though, he wanted to hurt her. He wanted her to feel what he was feeling. “I don’t want to see your face again!” He shouted angrily as the elevator doors opened and the nurses took him to his home for the next month or so

What Buck said killed Maddie. She wanted to grab Buck and hold him forever but she couldn’t, he hated her for this and all those thoughts about how he’d hate her but then understand and forgive her were thrown out the window. Now she thought she’d never have her baby brother again. Even with all those thoughts clouding her brain she signed the forms. A brother she’d never see again, one that hated her with every ounce of his being, was better than a miserable, or even dead brother.

Maybe this was the sacrifice that had to be made, maybe she’d have to give him up in order for him to be healthy but to her it was what had to be done.

 

* * *

 

 

It was a while after his admission, he was doing better and after a few days he had let Maddie see him, or, more realistically, begged her to visit. They managed to work things out between them and he understood why she was doing it. If the roles were reversed he’d do anything and everything to protect his big sister. 

Bucks time was coming to an end and he couldn’t be more thrilled, he hated this place. The food was garbage and he was restricted to close family members only so he didn’t get to see any of his friends. He was scared though, he didn’t know what his friends would think of him after this, but while he knew things might change a little, they’d change for the better. Therapy has been doing wonders for Buck, he doesn’t have to hide anything from anyone here, they don’t know him and they don’t know who he’s talking about and there are a people there, people who can relate to some of his problems and can help.

He was preparing for his last two days when Maddie came for her daily visit. She was here to prep him on everything he missed.

”So... I didn’t tell you this but everyone thinks you’re back home for some reason.. I just told them it was private family matters and I didn’t go because we haven’t spoken in years or something. I don’t know but they seemed to believe it. I just thought it’d be best if you told them yourself but if you want I can still tell them. I’m sorry I didn’t bring it up earlier I just completely forgot..”

“Thank you for not telling them” Buck pulled Maddie into a hug “I don’t exactly want to tell them but I know that it’s best for me to and I will but I’m just glad I get to do it on my terms. And hopefully because I’ll be done with my stay here it’ll be less stressful for everyone” Maddie paused for a minute as tears began to surface

”Maddie, what’s wrong, are you okay?” Buck asked stressing 

“Yeah! Yeah I’m fine! I’m just so happy and proud of how far you’ve come. I know you didn’t want to be here and it was especially hard me surprising you with it, but you’re literally glowing now! I know you’ve still got a way to go but you still seem a lot happier compared to when you first got here. Thank you- for cooperating. Ugh I love you so much!” Maddie said wiping away at her soaking wet face as Buck started to cry happy tears too

”I know I was horrible to you, and I’m so so sorry, I can’t apologise enough but I also have to thank you, where I was, everything I did, I was miserable. I—” Buck swallowed the lump in his throat as he began crying “I didn’t want to.. to live anymore and if it weren’t for you, I— well let’s not think about that. The point is, you did what you had to do no matter how much it hurt yourself and I love you so so much for that, just for everything you’ve ever done for me” Now Maddie was crying even harder

”I’m so glad you’re finally getting out in 2 days, now I’m just annoyed we have to wait so long!”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, so from here on I promise it’s not going to go so dark. There’s still gonna be a bit of anxiety and MAYBE a bit of talk about Bucks depression. The next chapter will especially tslk about it but after that one I have lots of fluff planned!


	9. Chapter 9

Buck was pacing around nervously in Maddies apartment, it was movie night and the squad was coming over but nobody had any clue Buck was back and he was telling them everything. It was terrifying, he was shaking and tears were threatening to spill over.

“Buck, hey hey, come here!” Maddie said pulling Buck into a hug “Look, I know this is tough, but just remember this is good for you. This is probably going to be the scariest part from here on out, and just remember they all love you and we’re all here for you” Maddie said comfortingly

“Yeah.. yeah. It’ll be okay. I just, I don’t want to be treated like I’m cracked and I’ll break at any time. I want everything to be the same as it was before, but it’s not possible. Except maybe things will change for the better, or maybe the won’t. They could, but you can’t tell!” Buck said as his breath began to shake

“Hey hey, lie down for a few minutes. Just close your eyes and relax. Hey, remember grandmas dog, Poppy. How much we loved her and how much she made us laugh. She seemed like a little angel and looked like a puppy but she was a rascal. Remember that time she forced our aunts dog to stay downstairs. She was so so silly, and remember how she would roll her back on a tennis ball to give herself a back massage..” Buck chucked at that as the memories got him out his panic attack

“Thank you, that really helped. But now I want a dog”

“Hmmm... no, no way! You know I’d end up looking after it when you were at work!”

“Aw, but they’re so cute and fluffy!”

“No!” 

“Fine.” Buck let out a huff. “Well see...” 

-

Chimney of course was the first to arrive, entering and giving Maddie a quick peck on the lips before he noticed Buck.

“Buck! Uh, you’re home!” Chimney said in surprise and embarrassment

“You guys are together!” Buck shouted cheerfully “You never told me!” He said gently hitting Maddies shoulder 

“Uh.. well we haven’t told anyone. We were just keeping it quiet until things got more serious..”

“Well, you know the drill Chim. Hurt her and I’ll give you a couple extra seconds every time you need me to bail your ass out!”  
Buck joked

“Uhh I-“ he stuttered 

“Buck! Hey, Karen, Bucks back at last! We missed you at the station!” Hen said entering the apartment with Karen lagging behind

“Hey Buck, it’s nice to see you’re back!” Karen said as Buck pulled her in for a hug

“Hey everyone! Buck? When did you get back?” Athena said pulling him in for a hug “It’s been forever!” At this point Buck was gonna be hugged out

\- 

Everyone got their stuff settled in for the night and helped Maddie lay out plates and whatnot before Eddie entered 

“Sorry I’m late! Traffic was really heav- Buck! You’re back! Hey!” Eddie said as he too, pulled Buck in for a hug, longer and tighter than the rest but who could guess why?

“Yeah! Yup! I’m back, ole backeroo...” Bucks face went red as he said that, not even two minutes of seeing Eddie and he’s being a dumbass 

“Uhm.. you mind if I speak to you for a sec?” Eddie said sheepishly

“Yeah, of course..” and with that they both went into Bucks guest room and shut the door for privacy 

“So... you were gone a really long time, and you didn’t text or call, or tell anyone other than Maddie.. what happened?”

“Uhm.. I, well, okay. I wanted to tell you privately so uhm, okay! I... was at a rehab. I’m fine now, I just didn’t want anyone to know at the time, and well, I also couldn’t talk to anyone and only Maddie was allowed. She actually made me do it, but I’m doing so much better now, I promise! But you can’t tell anyone because I was gonna do it myself after dinner!” 

“Buck.. it’s okay. There’s nothing to be ashamed of, when you go through a traumatic event like a car crash it’s okay! Nobody would’ve judged you and I- WE love you no matter what!”

“Eddie... it wasn’t to do with the car crash. It wasn’t an accident..” Buck said as tears ran down his face. “I did it on purpose but I promise you, I’m doing a lot better and it’ll never happen again! I’m so sorry! I’m so sorry..” Buck cried as Eddie hugged him again

“I’m sorry Buck, I didn’t realise what you were going through... I wish I could’ve been there for you.” Eddie said as he comfortingly held Bucks hands in his own “It still applies though.. that we still love you no matter what. We’re all here for you and we will always be by your side no matter what time it is, if you need us, we’ll be there. I promise” Buck wanted to tell Eddie he loved him in that moment but he knew it wasn’t the right time

“Thank you..”

Buck told everyone after they finished their meal, they all comforted him and promised the same thing Eddie did. He was so happy to have a family like them. A real family. He couldn’t be happier.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is short but I don’t want to dwell on the angst for too long. Also, Maddie will definitely see 😏😏


	10. Chapter 10

It was about 2 months later, Buck and Maddie once again getting all nicely dressed together. They went shopping the previous day, they weren’t going shopping for clothes but they ended up there anyway, Maddie was looking at the real reason. Staring it right in the eyes.

“I still can’t believe you adopted a dog yesterday. That was so stupid and impulsive. What are you gonna do with a dog?” Maddie was acting annoyed about it but oh my god look at it, how could she be so upset about welcoming this beautiful giant into her life

“Well.. look at her! It’s not my fault Chimney rescued her from a fire and let me see her. If anything it’s his fault, he shouldn’t have brought a dog near me. He knows better!” 

“Look at the poor baby... she’s so hairy and scruffy and skinny... poor little thing. How can we be leaving her already! Hell, we don’t even know if she’s trained!” 

“She is, she was in the ASPCA before someone got her and once we took her there they recognised her right away and told us all about her... then I couldn’t resist. Her names Tina, but I’m calling her Tia. She’s was abused and abandoned and they found her and when they did she was well trained, in fact, you’re gonna love this. She will bark aggressively when she sees someone being hurt! Isn’t that amazing, they didn’t even teach her that!” 

“God damnit..” she looked down at Tia who’s head was lying on her paws as she gave Maddie those puppy dog eyes. Buck grinned evilly, he got what he wanted and he got to help a poor little doggy too. It’s a win win situation. It didn’t even take a minute for him to fall in love with Tia. She was still wary but with her past she had every right to be.

“Anyway, I took her a little walk for her to do her business, she’s got food, water and pee pads JUST IN CASE, anything dangerous is out the way and she’s locked in the kitchen until we get home. Good? Good! Okay, you ready yet?”

“I was ready before you loser.” 

“Stop acting bitter about Tia, you’re just as in love with her as I am.” Maddie stuck her tongue out at that and went to ruffle Bucks hair before he pushed her arm away mid air

“Don’t!” Buck almost screamed 

-

Buck sad like a petty child in the backseat of Chimneys car as they drove off in the hot LA weather, wind blowing right in Bucks face.

“How are we gonna find a parking space? This is impossible!”

“Look at that ass! They parked in two spots! Oh wait.. that’s Hen.. oops!”

“Hey! We saved you a parking space, quick!” Hen shouted at them from her car as she got out to make space for them

“Thanks!” Chimney said as him and Maddie got out the car

“Where’s Buck? I thought he was coming too?” 

“He’s in the car, Buck come on!” Maddie said as she walked to the back seat and opened the door to find a sleeping Buck “Aw guys, look he’s sleeping!” They all gathered round to come find the angelic little Buck sleeping like a child. And to take blackmail pictures, lots and lots of blackmail pictures.

“Okay, come on Buck! Up up!” Maddie said as everyone moved so he wouldn’t know. Buck got out the car and as he was stretching his arms he let out a yawn

“Thanks for coming you guys, it means a lot to us” Hen said talking about her and Karen

-

Everyone arrived and waited at a big tree in the park for the rest of the squad to arrive. Buck looked around at all the happy people on the beautiful sunny day, waving all their pride gear around. He felt thankful for his friends and family. As everyone arrived they entered the main event where all the real crowds were. Everyone was happily walking forward as Buck began to feel a panic attack rise at all the people around him.

“Hey, you okay Buck?” Eddie asked softly

“I’m fine, it’s just... a lot of people..” Buck replied

“Come on, let’s go stand by the side for a second so you can catch your breath.” Eddie said leading Buck away from the large crowd

“You guys, come on!” Maddie shouted at them

“You can go on, we’ll be a few minutes!” Eddie shouted back as Buck took a drink of water and his panic attack calmed down

“You can go on, catch up. I just need another minute but I’ll be there in a sec!” 

“You sure?” Eddie asked concerned

“Yeah! I’ll be there in no time!” 

“Okay.. you have your phone so just call me if you get lost, alright?” 

“Yup!” Buck held his sweaty palms as he watched Eddie walk towards the rest of the squad. Buck looked around to see none of his friends were watching as he approached a little stall 

“Uhm- can I get an uhm- just a gay flag badge please...” Buck stuttered nervously

“Of course! That’ll be $3 please!” The woman at the stall said as Buck fumbled about to get his money “Hey.. I know it’s difficult at first, but it gets so much easier!” She continued and Buck let out a shy smile “Uh sorry, that was so rude. I didn’t mean to assume!” She apologised 

“No, you’re right. The only person who knows is my sister and I’m still learning to accept it a little. Thank you though, it means a lot!” 

“No problem!” She smiled, waving goodbye. Buck held the small pin in his hand tightly, although no one would see it, it still felt nice to have it. 

Eddie looked off from a short distance, mouth almost on the floor as he saw Buck buying a gay pride pin. He had no idea. He quickly turned around as he saw Buck approaching him and he went slow so Buck would catch up.

Eddie saw Buck was still nervous so he took Bucks hand and held it in his own. Buck was shocked by the action and he looked over at Eddies soft face. He didn’t let go and they continued to walk to the crowd, hand in hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is literally the only chapter I’ve had planned out and I’ve been waiting to do it for WAAAYYYYY too long. Also the next chapter will continue on at pride! Ugh i’m still so happy to have finally written this one though!!


	11. Chapter 11

As Buck and Eddie walked through the crowd, hand in hand, searching for their friends, Eddie couldn’t get the image of Buck buying a pride pin. He wondered if that meant Buck was gay, maybe he was buying it for a friend? But why would he be so secretive and anxious about it? Eddie subtly glanced over to Bucks other hand which was still clenched, undoubtedly with the pin in his hand.

Eddie didn’t know what to do, he wasn’t sure if he should tell Buck he saw and offer him support, if he should just subtly show extra support and maybe try bring the topic up or if he should let Buck have his privacy and keep it to himself. He figured he could try bring it up in conversation maybe? 

“Wait, I wanna buy something!” Eddie said as he gently tugged Buck towards a stall where there was paint sitting out for people to help themselves too. Eddie dipped his fingers in pink, purple and blue and swiped them across his two cheeks like war paint

“Why are you doing that?” Buck asked confused

“Isn’t it obvious?” 

“No?” Buck questioned “Who do we know that’s bisexual?” He pondered

“Oh god no! Buck it’s me! How could you forget me! Remember! Remember!” Eddie mocked

“You’re no- wait.. are you?” He asked stupidly

“Yup” Eddie said casually, popping the p.

“You never said! I didn’t realise.. does everybody else know?” 

“I don’t really know.. normally I don’t tell people I’m bisexual and it just... comes out? Y’know, casually in conversation or actions. Like now” 

“Wow... What guy actors do you think are hot?” Bucks eyes went wide when he realised how that might’ve sounded, he just got distracted by the news and forgot..

“Uh... hm... Let me think. Uh, yeah I can’t really think off the top of my head” he answered back

Eddie went to walk away as he was pulled back by a wondering Buck, he stared longingly at the paint. Just wishing he had the guts to paint his flag on his cheek and Eddie understood what was going on in Bucks head.

“Hey.. are you okay? Is there anything you wanna talk about?” 

Bucks eyes tightly closed shut as he comtemplated his next move. He opened one eye slightly to look at Eddie before quickly shutting it again and roughly pecking Eddie on the cheek, meaning to aim for his lips. 

“Uhm! Nope! Just wanted to do that to.. support you! I’m proud of you! Let’s go!” 

“Okay?” 

“Wait! Oh look! Water! Let me just get some!” Buck desperately wanted to get his cheeks painted like Eddie but he still had this anxiety about doing it. As Eddie washed the paint off his fingers Buck opened his clenched fist to look at the pin in his hand and then he looked again at the paint as he was unknowingly being watched by Eddie

“Hey.. do you want to get something painted on your face? I can do something for you? I WAS an art student after all!” Eddie asked and Buck gulped hard as he opened his hand to show Eddie the pin

“Do you want me to do that for you?” Buck stared at his shoes as he did the smallest nod possible. Before he got to painting Eddie pulled him in for a tight hug and he let a few happy tears of relief out 

“Look up” Eddie asked as he put the colours on six of his fingers and swiped them across each of Bucks cheeks and then... 

*BANG* *BANG* *BANG* 

The fireworks inside of Buck went as he leaned in and gently kissed Eddie on the lips. It was the best Buck had felt in so long, something he’d been like wanting to do for months. Buck pulled back, overwhelmed with a million different feelings, colours were bursting inside of him. He was overjoyed.

“That... was... so... amazing!” Eddie finally said after a minute of silence and Buck visibly relaxed

“I’ve wanted to do that for so long! It WAS amazing, but uh.. Maybe we should... you know? Uh.. run more tests just to see if we can do it better...” Buck said sheepishly as his face went beet red

“I would love that! Maybe we should, get back to our friends and try it again at, I don’t know? A restaurant?”

“Yes! Uh I mean yeah yeah.. cool!” Buck said trying to hide the smile that covered his whole face as he put his hand in Eddies and tried to guide him away

“Wait, your paint is a little messed up now.. let’s just wash it off and try again?” Buck nodded, adrenaline running through him as he knew this was him finally ready to let everyone know and this was his last few minutes as straight Buck. Because he ACTUALLY thinks he’s ever been good at straight Buck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There’s literally no point in me ending the chapter here because I’m about to continue it right onto the next one as I upload this but I still like to have chapters end at certain points I guess, I normally imagine them as like tv episodes where they cut the scene at something like this which sounds dumb but idc
> 
> nvm im gonna work on it later but i’m so excited ugh buddie melts my heart I need 9-1-1 back and canon buddie


	12. Chapter 12

Buck was so overwhelmed with happiness he was almost skipping towards his friends. He had his pride flag on his cheeks which he was hoping will come out for him, if that doesn’t then him holding Eddies hand with a gigantic grin and a skip in his step surely should. 

Buck thought particularly about his parents, but this was the first time he thought about them without getting upset. This time he didn’t dwell on the sadness of the past but of the happiness the future held. What life out of the closet might be like, the day where Buck gets to wake up to find Eddie sleeping in the same bed, them both spooning together. 

His family were no longer a problem. They weren’t even his real family. He got that now. He looked around at the sun beaming through the beautiful, lush trees. The people waving all their beautiful bright colours, being proud of who they are, showing their strength in this world. It was like he was living in black and white and it’s all hitting him at once.

He saw his friends all sitting on a picnic blanket with their food out, laughing and smiling and he felt like Rose and Jack did on the titanic. He wanted to scream “I’m the king of the world!” So loud his voice would be sore. He couldn’t do that but what was even better than that was kissing Eddie so before he told everyone and before he was in sight of them he kissed Eddie gently.

“Thank you so much, for everything. Maddie was my only family for so long, and when she left it broke me and I kind of became a slut and.. I’m rambling. Point is, you guys have been the best thing to ever happen to me, you especially. I’ve had a huge crush on you for months and I was so scared to act on it and today felt so right. I’m just so so sorry I wasn’t there for you.. when Maddie told me I had to be there for you I went and messed it all up and.. the thing happened and it was all about me. I’m so sorry Eddie...” 

Then it hit Eddie. He’d been so busy worrying about Bucks recovery from the car accident, then Buck being gone for a month that he realised he hadn’t told anyone about the pregnancy. He was always worrying about it but he couldn’t tell the squad without Buck being there so he’d decided to wait. Then Bucks health got in the way that he just totally forgot... Nobody knew and he was going to be a father in 5 months...

He had to wait until after today, he’d tell Buck before their date but he didn’t want to do anything that might make Buck want to go back into the closet. Buck was so happy, this was the happiest Eddie had ever actually seen him. How would Buck take it...

“Hey it’s okay! I’m just really glad you’re happy again!” He dragged Buck in for an awkward hug

Buck confidently walked up to the squads picnic area, Eddies hand in his as he displayed his pride flag. He waited there for a solid minute before anyone noticed it was him. Really killed the whole vibe but whatever. 

“Hey, glad you guys could finally make it!” Hen said squinting her eyes as the sun blinded them all

Buck cleared his throat as he beckoned everyone to look at him “Hello guys. Eddie and I are here!” He said holding Eddies hand up with his own

“Nice! Welcome back!” Chim said as he turned to Maddie and everyone continued their convos. Buck going into a hissy fit and dramatically sighing on the ground for everyone to pay attention to him

“Buck! What are you oh—“ Maddie started as she noticed the paint 

“Why are you sporting a rainbow flag on your cheeks Buck?” Hen asked while Maddie pulled out her phone to watch the reactions slowly unfold

“Oh you know, taste the rainbow! What do you think!” He exclaimed

“I think I’m confused?” Bobby chimed in

Buck looked at Eddie, using his actions to ask him a question which Eddie somehow fully understood as he put his arm around Buck and gave him a sweet but quick kiss on the lips.

“Hold o-“ Hen was first “When the he-“ Chim said second “Huh?” Bobby pondered “Congratulations!” Athena and Karen said at once

“Oh! OH! You have the bisexual flag on your cheek! I didn’t even notice! And you’re gay Buck? And you two-“ Maddie interrupted crunching loudly on her potato chips “are together.” Hen continued giving Maddie a death stare

“Uhm.. we kissed but that was just today so we’re still figuring things out I guess... but I hope we are..” Buck said sheepishly

“Me too..” he replied

“Awwwwww! I’m so glad I got my phone out this is literally so cute and so embarrassing for you guys when I share this with everyone!” 

“Maddie! Stop! You’re so annoying!” Buck whined back

“But you guys are so cute! I’ve been waiting forever!” Buck ducked his head into Eddies shoulder embarrassed as Eddie lifted his head up and kissed him once again so gently

“WELL, WELL, WELL!” A tall figure said standing behind Buck and Eddie “It finally happened! You’re finally tapping that!” Jenna leaned down to Bucks ear as she not so quietly whispered “Or is he tapping you if you know what I mean wink wink!” She said gently shoving him 

“JENNA! FIRST OFF EW! NO! Second, you’re here!” Buck said as he jumped on her for a hug

“And you’re a lot less pregnant!” Chim added

“Well, unfortunately I had to kick him out after 9 months because he was being too troublesome.”

“Wait go back.. you knew about Buck and Eddie?” Chimney asked

“Yeah, you didn’t? They were practically eye fucking for months. I was there like 2 days and I could see them both very coincidentally shift uncomfortably in their seat when they saw the other shirtless, god only know why!” She laughed as both Buck and Eddie turned red at her very true accusations 

“Hey Jenna. Shush!” Eddie said

“Aw come on. Buck loves a good tease! Makes his itty bitty heart flutter! And makes him do other things!” She winked 

“Jenna, I will kill you!” Buck whispered in her ear

She gasped loudly “Ugh! And he says he owns some kinky costumes for the bedroom! My gosh Buck!” Jenna teases, making a fun of him to everyone but Eddie who happened to be shifting uncomfortably at those thoughts

“Okay Okay i’m just teasin’ ya Buck. Seriously, I am proud of you. I’m also glad to see you’re back! I missed you! and your babysitting ability!” She stage whispered the last part

“Yeah, were all proud of you both!” They all congratulated and clinked their flasks together, real classy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like a traitor to my country for using the word potato chips over crisps but I’m guessing most people are American so I did it for y’all 😪😪


	13. Chapter 13

The night had ended, the laughs replaced with yawns. Eddie got in his car as everyone else got in their own. He hit his head on the steering wheel in frustration and sadness. It took months for his relationship with Buck to evolve into anything further and then as it happened, he remembered he had news that would surely change Bucks mind. Nobody even knew at all yet, he’d been so focused on a million other things that he’d forgotten.

He got home and he realised that now he had to tell everyone about it. He’d start off with Shannon, it was important for her to understand how things would be changing for them all, and after he told her he’d tell Christopher, then Buck privately and the rest of the squad he could tell at once.

Eddie spent the rest of the night thinking about the pregnancy, he hadn’t spent any time at all and it was all suddenly flooding his mind. He never even took a second to think about the fact he’d have to move house. He searched for his phone before searching Shannon in his contacts

‘We have to talk. It’s important. ASAP.’

‘About what?’ She replied

‘Face to face. Tomorrow?’

‘Is it about Christopher. Eddie, I haven’t done anything wrong. I’ve followed all your rules.’

‘It’s nothing to do with you or Christopher. You’ve been amazing but I have to tell you something.’

‘Okay. Tomorrow night. I have plans with Christopher in the afternoon.’

‘Okay. Thank you.’ Just then a notification from Buck popped up

‘Hey, so I was just wondering about the date. Is Tuesday good?’

‘Actually, we need to talk about something important if thats okay? I’d rather tell you before the date..’

‘Oh, Okay sure!’ Buck replied worriedly

‘See you on Sunday to talk about it? I can’t tomorrow.’

‘Yeah! Cool.’ Buck text as Eddie sat his phone flat down as he began to spend the rest of the night thinking about baby stuff

-

It was Saturday night and Eddie was driving to Shannon’s apartment to talk to her everything, afterwards he was going to tell Christopher he was due a baby sibling. He still had no idea whether or not it was a boy or girl though, as he hadn’t exactly had the best relationship with his one night stand.

He sat in his car looking through Shannon’s window where he could see her silhouette and he took in a deep breath before he headed inside.

“Hey, is Christopher asleep?” Eddie asked after they greeted eachother

“Eddie, we just had dinner. He’s playing with his toys while we talk.”

“Right, yeah of course.”

“So, what did you want to talk about?”

“Uh, I don’t really know how to ease into this but I could start with ‘I messed up, got drunk and... got a woman pregnant.’”

“What- you got a woma- how- I... Okay. So you got a woman pregnant. What are you going to do?”

“Well she doesn’t want a child so she said it’s either adoption or me and I want to keep it...”

“Okay.. uhm. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do or why you’re telling me?”

“This is going to be a huge change in Christopher’s life which in turn could affect you. I just wanted to let you know before Christopher because I think you should..”

“Okay so when are you telling Christopher?”

“Uhm.. Right after I told you? I don’t know? I feel like he’s going to have a lot of questions and it might be better if we were both there? I don’t really know Shannon, it’s a lot..” 

“Let’s go tell him right now then, rip the bandaid.”

”Now?!” Shannon was already walking towards Christopher’s room and he followed her. He snuck up behind Christopher and lifted him into a hug

”Daddy! What are you doing here?” He asked in between giggles as Eddie spinner him around 

“Well, I have news!” He said as he put Christoper down “So, well, we’ll just dive right into it. Christopher, you’re gonna be a big brother!” 

“Yay!” He paused for a second “Mommy you’re pregnant?”

”No sweetie, your daddies having the baby” she replied

”Daddies can’t get pregnant silly!” 

“Uh, that’s right but.. well daddy’s having a baby with another woman. Sadly she won’t be here though. It’ll just be you and me.” Eddie replied with a sad smile

”Buck can be a daddy too!” Eddies eyes widened and he stuttered for a second. He was proud his son understood that two daddies can have a baby but he wasn’t expecting this..

”Well, sweetie, Buck isn’t the daddy.. Maybe he might help out but he’s not my husband so it’ll just be me most of the time..”

”You’re so silly daddy, you need to be husbands with Buck!” Shannon began grinning as she tried to hold back a laugh

”Uh.. I—“

”You’re right Christopher, why hasn’t daddy married Buck?” Shannon began to tease

”Wanna read a book?” Eddie yelled a little too loud to avoid the awkward conversation

”Can I say goodnight to Daddy 2 point 0?” Christopher asked as he began a new nickname for Buck and Eddies face heat up and he FaceTimed Buck knowing he was better giving up than fighting. Shannon left the room to go do her own thing.

”Hey Eddie, I’m so glad you called! I wanted to know about our next date?” Buck immediately said as he picked up facetime and Christopher let out an exaggerated gasp

”Daddy you’re boyfriends with Daddy 2.0?”

“Daddy 2.0.” Buck questioned 

“That’s your new nickname since you’re marrying daddy!” 

“Christopher, Daddy isn’t marrying Buck..” Eddie said covering the phone so Buck couldn’t hear

”Daddy 2.0!” Christopher corrected

”Don’t you wanna marry me Daddy?” Buck teased the nickname jokingly

”Daddy wants Christopher to go to sleep!” Eddies voice cracked 

“Night Daddy 2.0, sweet dreams!” 

“Night night, don’t let the bed bugs bite!” Buck answered back

”I’ll talk to you later?” 

“Yeah, talk to you later... daddy!” Buck laughed as he hung up

 

-

 

“I’m sorry about that... I hope it didn’t make you uncomfortable?” Eddie opened the door to his house while he was once again FaceTiming Buck

“I didn’t mind it. So, daddy 2.0? What’s that about?” 

“Uh, that’s a conversation we should have in person..”

”It’s only 9pm, and if I’m not mistaken neither of us have a shift tomorrow? You could come over and we could talk now? If you want to of course?” 

“Yeah.. that sounds good. I’ll just take a quick shower and be there in 30 mins?” 

“Sure, see ya! Have fun daddy!” There it was again, he was never gonna hear the end of that one

He took a shower and gave his hair a little towel dry, it wasn’t even near dry but it’d be fine. It’ll dry within an hour and Buck won’t mind. He was about to leave to drive to Bucks when he got a knock on the door, Buck?

”You seem surprised, you did say 30 minutes right?” 

“Yeah, I just thought you meant your house?” 

“Nope. Are you gonna let me in or are you gonna freeze me to death?” Eddie awkwardly invited Buck in. He was about to tell Buck his secret and he was terrified to say the least. He knew this would be the end of their very short lived romance.

Buck pulled out a bottle of red wine from the paper bag in his hand and Eddie squinted his eyes “Relaaaaxxxxx, I ubered here!” Why not, Eddie thought. Wine would help a little right now. 

Buck got settled as Eddie got out the wine glasses and poured them some... a lot, of wine. You’re only supposed to slightly fill the glass but Eddie had almost completely filled it, he really needed some liquid courage and he figured Buck would need some liquid... liquid?

”That’s a lot.. are you okay?” Buck began to feel like Eddie regretted what happened between them and he started bringing himself down until he remembered he deserved way better than this shi-

“No. We have to talk, I kinda need this.. I don’t think you’re gonna wanna date me after this and to save as much time and awkwardness as possible I got a girl pregnant a few months ago, she’s not going to be part of its life and it’ll just be me!” Eddie quickly spat out and Bucks mouth opened and closed trying to say something that he couldn’t get out

”That was a lot.. but I don’t hate you. I still wanna be with you, it doesn’t change anything. Just because we’re, forgive me if I’m being too forward, dating, doesn’t mean you’re not still my best friend. I’m here for you, I’ll help out as much as I can. You don’t have to do this alone.” Eddie let out a sigh of relief as he leaned over and quickly pecked Bucks lips

”Thank you.. I’m so relieved. I thought you wouldn’t wanna be with me anymore..”

“I’ve wanted this for soooo long, and nothings gonna hold me back. Unless you didn’t want it because I’m not a serial killer but... you know what I mean!” Eddie leaned over to kiss Buck again and things began to get heated, they made out and ended up on top of eachother and clothes were removed..

 

-

 

Eddie opened his eyes from the blinding sun that somehow managed to stream through his blinds and burn through his eyelids. He turned over to find a shirtless Buck in nothing but his underwear. So much for the Uber eh?

Bucks eyes opened a few minutes later as he felt Eddie pressed up against him, making Buck the little spoon. Nobody else would know about this though, he didn’t want them to know he was the bottom when it came to snuggling.

”Mm.. mornin’ daddy” Eddies face went bright red from that as he lightly shoved Buck away

”Things got pretty wild last night I see. Wow, you even have disheveled hair, dirty!” Buck winked

”Ah yes, a whole night of talking about our feelings and snuggling after some heart filled talks. Sooo dirty!” Eddie laughed back

”You know, I used to be a big slut, but sex isn’t even remotely near as amazing as last night..”

”That’s because you were gay, sleeping with women.. you’ve yet to sleep with me yet!” Eddie teased back causing Buck to passionately kiss from his lips, to his jaw, to his neck before he stopped.

”Presenting to you, a premiere of what will soon ensue. One date, two to go!” Buck smirked back after letting Eddie have a little taste but he wasn’t amused

”You’re so not a top!” 

“I am too!” Buck defended with a higher pitched voice than normal, indicating he was in fact, not a top.

”Your voice went high, you’re lying and you know it! Ha!” Eddie joked playfully

”We”ll just have to see!” Buck hopped up off the bed and skipped to the shower leaving Eddie alone with those thoughts

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m quickly trying to conclude this story so I’m not gonna preview it, not that that’s any different, but what I mean is it might be sloppy and there might be a little repetition. Sorry!


	14. Chapter 14

Buck and Eddies romance had been quite a quick one, they stuck to the rules when it came to date number three, they officially called themselves boyfriends, Christopher still called Buck ‘daddy 2.0’ and Buck honestly loved it. He’d always wanted to be a dad and yeah, it’s way way too soon to even consider himself that and Christopher was too young to realise relationships need lots of time, but it was still really amazing to think about.

Now, back to the present. It’s time. Eddie got a call at eleven o’clock at night from Lauren, the baby is coming she said, wait— THE BABY IS COMING! Eddie shot up off the sofa and his first thought was to call Shannon to look after Christopher, then came Buck out the shower with a towel wrapped around his waist and he froze at the sight of Eddies panic.

”THE BABY IS COMING!” Eddie frantically ran towards his room to get his clothes back on and he threw some at Buck “You need to drive me, I can’t drive like this my heart is racing I feel like I’ve had a hundred cups of coffee I’m gonna have another baby soon oh my god where are my keys where are my damn keys damnit!” Wow, that was all one sentence.

Buck put his hands on Eddie’s shoulder to bring him out his panic and told him it’s gonna be fine and in just a few hours he’d have a little baby girl in his hands. Then he gave Eddie a quick peck on the lips only a few seconds before the door knocked gently.

”Shannon! Christopher’s still asleep, he’s really out cold because I’ve been a maniac! Uh, make yourself at home, you know how long labour can be, eat, shower, sleep, you can use my bed, please! I’ll see you! Good luck! Why am I saying good luck to you? Come on Buck!” He said grabbing Bucks arm and dragging him outside 

“Maybe you don’t want me to show up there with nothing but a towel on?” 

“Right! What are you waiting for, get dressed!” And so he did, two minutes later Buck was frantically running to the drivers seat and suddenly he remembered everything. It was his first time in the front of a car ever since the accident. Eddie immediately noticed how he felt and offered to drive and so he did. 

“Buck, I’m so sorry, I completely forgot..” Eddie said softly while tears welled in Bucks eyes

”No, Eddie, it’s okay. I just don’t think it’s safe for me to drive in a situation like this for the first time. Maybe, uhm, I could drive around a little while you’re in the hospital. I figure you might want a private conversation with Lauren and maybe I can grab you some stuff. Actually, I got her a teddy bear but I left it at my house. Didn’t expect this weekend to be _the_ weekend..”

”Buck, I agree, it’s not the best time for you to be driving, but I also don’t think your first time should be alone. I’m sorry, I just really care about you. Maybe you could drive around the parking lot slowly?” Buck nodded as the tears began to stream down his face 

“I’m sorry, you’re right though. Ugh,” Buck wiped the tears away and sniffed “This is embarrassing, huh?” 

“No, Buck it’s not, it’s normal. We all just want you to be as safe as possible and things take time, okay? I love you and I’ll help you get through this.” Eddie said as he kissed Bucks forehead and set off to drive to the hospital

About twenty minutes later they arrived out the hospital and Eddie got out the drivers seat, Buck switching to the drivers seat a second later so he could park. He waved Buck off as he hurriedly ran in the hospital leaving Buck alone. Buck bit his lip a little as he considered Eddie’s words.

Buck drove slowly around the parking lot considering his options, then he came to the conclusion he’s a grown man. Not a child, he can drive himself. He carefully and slowly drove to his own home where he picked up the cute stuffed brown bear and a blanket he’d made himself, he was quite proud of it. 

Bucks red eyes cleared up after driving for a while and he pulled over after he got a text from Eddie, see, he was responsible. ‘We’re gonna be a while, maybe you should go to the cafetrria and eat.’ So Buck decided to text Maddie, see if she was up.

’Hey, you up? Eddie’s at the hospital and I was just wondering if you wanted some company? I’m also driving again, not right now though, I pulled over because I’m responsible.’ He text her and she immediately responded

’Oh my god, the baby’s coming?’ 

‘Yes!’

’That’s so exciting!’ Maddie panicked ‘You’re driving alone? Buck you can’t do that!’ 

‘Relax. I’m fine.’

’Buck. Go home, now.’ 

’And leave Eddie with no way to get home? I’m just gonna pick up some stuff, diapers, a car seat for the baby, clothes.. food? He really didn’t bring anything huh..’ 

‘No! I know Eddie wouldn’t let you do this alone and I **will** tell him.’ Buck thought it best not to respond, he wouldn’t lie but he wouldn’t tell the truth either.

Buck, shockingly, managed to get all that done, sticking to the slow, careful driving, and he walked into the hospital cafeteria. He sat down in the very corner and opened up his fast food before shooting Eddie a text saying he’d brought some stuff.

’Buck, you told me you agreed you shouldn’t be driving. How could you do this to me right now?’

’I was safe. I drove slowly and carefully. I’m surprised the cops didn’t pull me over with how slow I was.’

’You lied to me. Don’t do that! You can’t put your safety last!’ Buck began to feel guilty and his heart started racing with tears being brought to his eyes again.

’I’m sorry! I thought I could! I thought you could trust me enough.’ Buck felt cold and angry towards Eddie right now, like Eddie was rue one who had betrayed him. He grabbed the stuff and stomped towards the car, almost throwing them in the back of the car. He put the car seat in the back knowing Eddie wouldn’t trust him to put it in properly and he told Eddie all the stuff was there.

’Why are you texting me this?’ ‘Buck?’ ‘You’re leaving?!’ ‘Buck, I’m so sorry, please just come back!’ Eddie flooded Bucks phone with these panicked texts all too quick and Buck wanted to leave him hanging for hurting him but he decided to act like an adult that wasn’t a total sadist, and told him he was just waiting in the car.

Buck very quickly got tired and retired to the back seat with his tiny baby blanket covering him, what even was the point? It was like a handkerchief. He was fast asleep until he heard the door open and Eddie gently nudging him.

”Hmm? What’s going on, what time is it.” 

“It’s four o’clock in the morning. The baby’s here and I want you to meet her.” Buck shot up and gently shoved Eddie out the way before grabbing the baby stuff for her and bolting towards the entrance as Eddie caught up with him.

”What’s her name? Is it a her? You just told me you thought she was a she so I don’t actually know!” 

“Her name is, well we don’t have a name yet.. technically me? Lauren is still set on not being a part of her life.”

”Hey, it’s gonna be okay! She doesn’t need a mother, you’re like superman, you can be both!” Eddie stopped in his tracks with anxiousness quickly painting his face.

”What’s the matter?” 

“Look, I know it’s so quick, so so quick, like, record quick, if this was a race we’d have beaten Usain Bolt by a thousand miles, but, maybe you could _really_ be ‘Daddy 2.0’, to Christopher _and_  her?” Bucks heart immediately melted, he definitely knew it was quick logically speaking, but he didn’t feel it. He felt ready for this, ready to become a father to both of Eddies children, ready to take this extra step, or lunge, forward. Buck began to cry, but this time it was happy. He sobbed as he wrapped his arms around Eddie and let out a few muffled “yes’s” 

Eddie grabbed Bucks hand as they walked into the hospital together, to introduce Buck to his newborn child.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At last, it’s done! This story has been really great to write, I’ve incorporated some of my own experiences into it and it is special. To me it shows that while things are tough, you need to fight, to see the future for the bright and gloriousness it can be. 
> 
> I’ve also been considering whether or not I should carry this universe onto multiple other stories. They wouldn’t be as deep or long as this, just short one shots set in the same universe as this, mostly lighthearted and some dad Buck and dad Eddie shenanigans.
> 
> P.S. Is it yeses or yes’s, or are they even a word at all?

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t spell check or grammar check or even re-read when I’m done so expect a lot of that maybe, maybe not but thank you for reading my grammatically incorrect, badly written fanfic!


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